Why Self Love is important.

I was emotionally available when I met you. I was done with dating and was only interested in self discovery. Finding more about myself. Having a date with myself. I was never going to let anyone in. Was afraid of getting hurt again. But then you came along and made all that change. It was your personality. Staying awake was finally better than going to sleep. Finally my reality outweighs my dreams. 

Our love was like a roller coaster. It was like a walk in the park. It was like watching my favorite movie. It was like surfing; adventurous and fun. It was a 247 anxiety feeling, I couldn't catch my breath. Life was moving too fast. I was falling in love, the first time I was falling and wasn't afraid. 

It was beautiful. I felt like the luckiest girl on Earth. It wasn't perfect but it was beautiful. You weren't my dream guy but you were making my dreams come to a reality. I was scared but I loved the feeling anyway. 

You were the highest of highs. But you were also the lowest of lows

You were my high point and also my lowest point. I felt nothing without you and felt everything when you came into my life.

Losing you will be a bad dream. You were the clear skies in my life. The warmth in my winter. Being with you felt like I couldn't move, like I was stuck. Like I was going no where. And that was exactly what I wanted, I wanted to go nowhere but remain right there in your arms forever.  

You destroyed me when you left. I was so void from within. There was nothing left. No soul. You took that with you. I wasn't unhappy that I lost you, I was unhappy that it was also the death of of the real me.

Three years has gone by and I still miss thee real me, I even miss the me when I was with you.

Your presence was a gift. Little did I know, your absence would leave me an even better present: the opportunity to rebuild

You were my muse. I finally got the courage to restart my life from the scratch and this time make it even better. I finally started to learn to love myself. The quick road to self recovery and healing.

I started to look for something to love again; as I loved you. I was looking for a new passion, a new drive. I was looking for where to channel my energy into. I started to surround myself with loved ones, friends and family. As they will play integral role in this journey. They gave me the strength to move on. 

I was no longer looking for your love and acceptance, I had something much better — my acceptance and love for myself.

The emptiness in me was gradually fading away. I began to fill this emptiness with love, happiness, joy and purpose. I was coloring my life. I began to see a great part of myself I didn't even know existed. I was more positive about myself.

Even if there were days I missed you and wished you were with me (and trust me, there were many), I knew I was with the person I really needed to be with: me

I won't deny it, there was days I wish you were still here. But I needed this; I needed to date me a little.

You taught me to love myself, that I am grateful for. I never regret meeting you. I only regret not loving myself a little more. You made me change me for the better. You made me realize that life was more about what we felt of ourselves and not what someone else felt about us. You made me better. You were like a manure in my life. 

For this, I am grateful.